Self Reflection, who do you see when you look in the mirror? Watching people look in the mirror, makes you wonder who they really see. We all know that you see our own reflection but is there more? Rarely do we stare in to the eyes of the reflection where the real person stands.
When people look in the mirror they are looking at their hair, their makeup, clothes, for blemishes on their face, they avoid the eyes all together.
I watched a lady stare into the mirror. I stopped to watch her. She was smiling, giggling and playing with her hair. She had it pulled up in a pony tail on top of her head like pebbles. The make-up she had applied in light blue shades on her eyes and super rosy cheeks were way too much. However, she was smiling and that is all that matters. She reached out and touched the mirror as if there was someone else there. She leaned in and kisses the mirror, then giggled. She was enjoying the person that she could see.
When she began to walk off she waved at the mirror person – smiled and blew her a kiss. She turned to leave – but paused to lean back for one more peek. She liked that girl in the mirror.
It was just minutes later she came back to check on her mirror friend. She was still there but did not seem as pleased with her. She touched her, but jerked her hand back and glared at her with angry eyes. She began talking to her in a low voice that only the mirror friend could hear. She was obviously getting angry. What was the mirror telling her – who did she see? She was seeing the same image as just a few minutes before.
She screamed "Fuck you! – I hate you! You make me sick! Leave me alone you bitch!" She went to strike the mirror friend but the staff around her called her name and she stopped. Quickly she stated, "She started it." Pointing to the mirror.
How do you respond when you look in the mirror? You have seen the same face all your life. When you were a baby you coo'd and smiled at that face. As you have grown up looking at the same face – the same person is looking back no matter what you have been through in your life. You will always see the same face.
I was talking to my business coach PJ McClure who is the author of "Flip the Switch How to turn on and turn up your mindset". A subject came up that I have stalled with many times. Who I used to be…things I have done in the past as a teenager and young adult. The decisions I made were not all good ones, but who makes perfect life decisions? The ones that I made sent me down several painful roads with lots of blocks and low valleys. I felt like the young girl who was looking in the mirror and ranting at the "other" girl as if she was someone who I did not know.
PJ said "You know that your own un-forgiveness is holding you back" I paused, "What?" PJ repeated, "You have not forgiven yourself for your past. You are that girl – You are you. No matter what you have done, or what life choices you made, you are still you. Because of those life choices you are in the place you are right now. Those choices made you who you are today."
I thought for a second – and I hate it when someone is so right it is plain and simply in your face. Yes I am me, I am her, I am that girl. I am the women she built from all the dirt she walked through. I am God's baby girl who he designed with such power, confidence, and boldness that it is ok to bring that little girl into one. Talking to PJ is like sitting in front of that mirror as the young lady did – he helps you see who you are and points at what you do not want to face. Is it hard….yes.
As quoted from page 121 of PJ's book it says " If you rev-up your engine thinking you're giving it your best, giving it all you have got to get somewhere, but at the same time pulling on the emergency brakes that are holding you back – you burn out. Everything you try to do fails or stumbles." Forgiveness is like releasing the breaks, everything goes allot easier. I cannot tell it like PJ can – read his book.
The young girl who was looking in the mirror was not angry at anybody else but herself. She refused to admit it was not herself.
As a nurse who has seen many people depressed and struggling over things that happened in their life when they were as young as 4yrs old and they are 40yr old. Even thought it was a bad event it holds no power over today, you hold the power.
Slowly transitioning out of the nursing field after a total of 25 years -stepping out into new world of business, marketing, becoming an author has been a big change. Forgiveness is a must. If you are like me and have a past that you are looking at in the mirror – start today and tell that person you forgive them.
Release the breaks – set the sails – open the flood gates the past is no longer you. Stop holding back – your dreams want to fly join me.
Angela Brooks is the author of her best seller "The Nurses Voice", and is a contributor to the nursing magazines "Scrubs Magazine" and "NurseTogether.com". She is also a marketing leader for growing Health Company whose mission is to inspire individuals to lives of wellness, purpose, and abundance!
She is the founder of angelabrook.com, a company dedicated to helping empower nurses who works in the mental health field. Not just for nurses – but those that nurse others in life. She is the nurses voice, the voice for those unheard.
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